In other news 30/7/13

I have been asked to do this again… I think just because the rest of the Well Did You Evah team are glad I actually paid attention to the news last week.

So, This weeks post will feature, Handcuffs, Bigfoot, Lady Gaga and Jelly fish… Before you think of it, no Big foot hasn’t handcuffed it’s self to Lady Gaga and some how a Jelly fish was involved.

1. Handcuffs

SEX TOYS BONDAGE EQUIPMENT ON SALE AT AN ANN SUMMERS SEX SHOP. H

Lots of people have heard the hype of Fifty Shades of Grey? If you haven’t head out to your local charity shop… or maybe not, first think on how dirty minded you are. If you shy away or look in disgust just someone mentioning sex, then stay away. Some time in the past year, possibly a bit longer than that, the Fifty Shades Trilogy came onto bookshops highlighting the world of BDSM- which to be honest has been around a while- and bringing controversy. Taking lessons from the Big Quiz of 2012 we at Well Did You Evah call these BDSM, pantie dropping books, Kinky Fuckery. Apparently, we can thank these books for helping us out of the recession. Fifty Shades

Although Fifty Shades has got to the point of being possibly one of the most popular books in charity shops, and there is the possibility that these other kinky fuckery books are too graphic or something to be on proper bookshelves.  The UK are still keeping up with Kinky practices in the bedroom.

The past 3 years the fire brigade, in London, have been called out to 79 incidents where couples have used handcuffs and lost the key. Now I have two theories on this. 1, they were just so in the moment they lost the key. Or 2, They were secretly hoping a hot fireman/men (more the better) would join in.

What happened to the days where handcuffs came with a spare key?

But the Fire service have also admitted to other strange situations which they have been called out to, one being some man trapped his penis in a toaster… now I’m not sure if I want to know or not.

For the top ten- I’ll admit some of these I wouldn’t class as that bad- http://metro.co.uk/2013/07/29/top-ten-weirdest-objects-london-fire-brigade-has-had-to-free-people-from-3902591/

 

2. Bigfoot

Now, does he- or you never know she- exist? There has been another apparent sighting in Canada. From this video that has made it into a UK newspaper, the figure walking could easily be a tall person. But I guess it depends how much you want it to be Sasquatch.

On Youtube you can find loads of videos of Sasquatch, so by this rate, if Big Foot does exist, he’s either reproduced and has children all over the world or has access to a private jet. Considering his existence is questioned, he’s doing a pretty good job by confusing the human race. This video was posted on the 24th of July so if your on the watch for Bigfoot, get your passport and make travel arrangements for Canada! As for me I’m going back on the hunt for Narnia.

 

3. Lady Gaga

This Super Famous Popstar, responsible for creating songs such as Bad Romance and Poker Face and known for her striking dress sense. Has announced some news that I’m sure her devout fans will be (or will have been) sending her, “Get Well Soon Mother Monster,” cards.

Although she has hidden the news, Lady Gaga was a performance away from a hip replacement. Now I have never been personally to a Lady Gaga gig, but I see from everything she does she puts 100% into her work, so honestly I do want to give her a hug and wish her well. After 6 months she believes she is recovered, although it is thought she would have needed a year, if her injury had gotten worse and she needed a full hip replacement, which would disrupt her tour dates

Lady Gaga again, is showing the world is not only she is she an individual, that people can look up to, but with her own strength, she can over come her illnesses to be there for fans.

Full Story- http://www.theguardian.com/music/2013/jul/30/lady-gaga-hip-replacement-scare

 

4. Jelly Fish

It’s been reported that the UK has seen a rise in Jellyfish on it’s coast. They said it’s down to the warm weather… yes around 7 days of warm weather new animals start flocking to the UK… Does this mean if the UK can keep up 14 days of warm weather we could end up growing our own banana’s in our back gardens?

News2 Banana

I doubt the Jellyfish are going to stay here long once they figure out this rain we are having is a permanent thing.

Another theory why the Jellyfish are coming to the UK is that Ponyo (Studio Ghibli) is out there looking for Sōsuke, that also explains the storms and flooding too.

News 2 PonyoNow if you are in the UK and decide to dare going to the beach with this weather it is advised, not to follow the Friends Episode where Monica gets stung by a Jellyfish and Chandler pees on her to stop the pain, according to some big scientist dude this act is a myth and is just unhygienic, plus think what this will look like to other British folk on the beach… It is funny on the Friends episode though.

That’s it for this week… lets see if I’m back to do this next week…

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In Other News…

Here in England, there is one thing everyone is talking about. Turn on the news it will be there. Yup. England is now infested with zombies and the start of the apocalypse is coming. We are all indoors now and the government is supplying us all with shot guns.

– Ok that is a massive lie.

News1 baby1

A few days ago, the media became a pack of hounds surrounding the royal family like how Witches and Wizards surrounded Harry Potter in the fight in the last book. Only, Harry wasn’t going into labour… possibly could have come up with a better analogy. Kate went into labour, with the kid which is 3rd in line to the throne. Or so they say,

Private Eye I personally hope the Queen suddenly announces she is immortal and we have a queen on the throne for the foreseeable future.

It was announced Kate had a baby boy, a few hours before they announced it to the media. So, overall, there was a few hours in this world the kid still didn’t exactly exist. The stork snuck in back delivered the baby and the two parents needed a few hours to get over the fact the stork rumours where true.

24.7.2013 the baby prince was named- Prince George Alexander Louis,  possibly now that this piece of news is released things will calm down a bit. I respect this birth is a big thing, but I think any mother would see being in pain and going into labour and delivering a baby a big thing, occasionally the only media coverage they will get is a self submitted picture and announcement into a newspaper. Not a continuous stalking of the news people.

So, just to go over that there is other things happening here in England, I’m going to do a brief scan of news sites and list some of the more interesting stories- after filtering out the royal related stuff. Yes this is where I actually pay attention to the news.

1. Changes to English Money– We are changing to Euros!… Yeah like that will ever happen this life time.

Jane Austen banknote

Those unfamiliar to the English currency, there are 4 paper notes, well actually 3 and a half, £5, £10, £20 and £50. I say a half as an official £50 is hardly seen, no it’s not because most of us are that poor they don’t bother making them as it is seen as torture, it’s because £50 is the note which has been copied most- there have been a lot of fake £50 notes about.

But they are changing the £10 note. Most paper notes have famous people on, I’m not going to make any guesses which country has who, chances are I will get it wrong and be faced with a lot of complaints. In England, the person on the £10 note was evolution person Charles Darwin, the man who discovered God wasn’t/might not be the cause of everything, there for God can’t be blamed for everything. Charles Darwin will be kicked off the paper note, by Author, Jane Austen. There haven’t been many women on the notes- I’m just copying that part from what’s on this news site, I have no idea how they are going to explain that the female queen is on every note-  This can be seen as a big thing. I’d say it could also be an educational experience and get young people into reading classics, but I know from personal experience the only thing young people are bothered about in money is the number in the corner that tells them how much it is worth. This change will happen around 2017, so, English people have a while to decide if they are going to save their Darwin £10 or spend it. Another change is that Chocolate Lady, Elizabeth Fry will be removed by Winston Churchill on the £5.

One woman is being removed, but is being replaced by a more known, influential woman, who will be on a higher valued note… How about a female- besides the Queen- Gets on the £20 next?

2. Ponies-  Unfortunately English Bronies haven’t found Equestria so, this has nothing to do with My Little Pony… in fact I’d keep them away from this.

I’ve found three news articles relating to Ponies/Horses. Neither of them good. See? Even when a New English Monarch has been born life goes on. Basically, one pony has drown, interesting story the pony ran into the water… and three horses have died in a car accident, I’d love to think these horses were driving the car, possibly intoxicated, but it was a case of the trailer collided with a lorry. R.I.P Horsies, we hope you get to Equestria safely.

A more entertaining, horse related news story, which wasn’t reported because the horse died. A Woman, took a horse into Mc Donald’s. Yes, an actual living horse went into a Mc Donald’s fast food restaurant. In their defence they could have made things easier if the woman had been allowed through the drive thru like she originally tried to do. I would take my hat off to this woman if I wore a hat. This woman was fined, it does break health and safety rules. At least the rest of us now know not to take a horse to Mc Donald’s even if we are desperate for a Happy Meal or a McFlurry.

3. Weather-  This has to be mentioned.

News1 weather1

If you haven’t been to England, there is one world to describe the weather which haunts us around 95% of the time.

News1 Weather Horrible. However, there has been a case where us Britons have been boiling like our morning, afternoon and hourly cups of tea. For the first time in a while, England has been hit with a heatwave. Majority of us couldn’t cope, the MET office- the thing that is supposed to tell us when the weather is going to be really bad- even told us we may struggle. Barbecues came out at the start then of course the British way of complaining came out a few hours later. For some of you us complaining about temperatures what on occasion reached 30 degrees, seems like nothing.

For us Britons who live under almost constant clouds and rain, the sun is something which most time astonishes us and temperatures such as the ones we had been having is a cause for concern about a drought. Don’t worry though we still have our tea breaks though so we got though it till the thunder storms started a few days ago… Someone needs to get a psychiatrist on to the weather, I believe there could be a possible mood disorder to diagnose.

4. The A&E 

Really, they have just reported what most of us in England have suspected in the first place. Well, most of us who use the NHS A&E- Accident and Emergency, where you go in emergency or if you think you have broken something, will agree, you have to wait along time to see someone, unless you have chest pains or are bleeding all over the floor. A report came out telling us A&E’s are under achieving. To be honest, in England depending who you ask, lot’s of things are under achieving. If it isn’t students grades it’s the government. The Government controls everything so lets get rid of blaming the specifics and ask politics.

It was easy to see that this was going to happen though, the NHS has been reported multiple times to be understaffed. This is one news report that needs to be acted on, the NHS provides a large sector of health care for the whole of the United Kingdom. This is free health care- I think they need to put free in quotation marks. It’s free if you don’t need medication or an NHS dentist- however it still means we get to see a health professional with no cost so it is effective. It’s easy to see, with zero cost, the amount of people accessing, or trying to access, the NHS services why waiting times would be long. For most hospitals the A&E is the front line, here you can expect any and all injuries, non serious and life threatening so it is important that the A&E is working well.

So, this is just a small preview of what other things are happening in the UK. Of course, there is a lot more happening it’s a whole country and we don’t just revolve around the royal family.